Ha!

Ha!

Ok so I’m not sure that ‘Ha’ is actually classed as a word by definition.  (I’m not going to even check because frankly, I want this to be  my #WordoftheWeek.  I hope Jocelyn at The Reading Residence, whose linky this is, doesn’t mind.

On with my blog then…

“Ha!” is the word that came to mind immediately after reading a blogpost by Sarah Ockwell-Smith about Gina Ford’s book ‘The Contented Mother’s Guide’.

Now there’s various reasons why I didn’t agree to follow Ford’s strict routine for our little bear.  All of the reasons are basically outlined by Ockwell-Smith in her blog.

The point that particularly struck a cord with me was on PND, which I have blogged about before.  In my opinion, Ford’s book is actually very dangerous.

The reason and question being: why put any more pressure on a new mum/parents to feel ‘perfect’ then there already is?  Yes, I appreciate that the book should perhaps only be seen and used as a guide.  But the fact is that a sleep-deprived, anxious, doting, confused, hormone-possessed, post-natal mum simply wants to do their best for their newborn and is often desperate for advice.  Fine.  Seek advice.  But surely only parents are ‘qualified’ to do so?  I don’t believe that Ford is a parent!

Ok, I’m ranting but this topic really does infuriate me…

PND is dangerous.  PND is very much taboo, with every new Mum wanting to look like they’re coping in a pink (or blue) fluffy world and not wanting to ask for help (until PND has got them in a vice-grip).

New mums need support, not an air-brushed sign post in the form of this book.

That’s my opinion.  What do you think?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding ‘Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

 Thank you.

All work and no play… the debate

Picture source: via Pinterest

This was going to be an attempt at a humourous little poem covering all the different ways a child learns by playing.  However, my #TheThemeGame with The Reading Residence and Redpeffer will now take on a more ‘debatable’ tone for the word ‘play’.

If you’ve read The Daily Mail article “Shift Victory for Working Mothers”, you will know that PC Michelle Chew has recently won a 3 year sexual discrimination battle with her police force.  An employment tribunal has decided that her force breached the 1975 Sexual Discrimination Act.

Now, as a working mum of a small child, I can definitely see both sides of this debate.

Before Child (BC) I would have been more than a little miffed if a colleague got what basically amounts to special treatment and ‘got out of’ covering unsociable shifts and yucky stupidly early starts (although you get that as a parent – but I digress).  You join a job knowing the hours and you have to take it on the chin.

But After Child (AC), I can totally see why a working mum (or parent, but this is obviously focussing on Mums) would want to work ‘normal hours’.

After my maternity leave I applied for a flexible shift pattern and was very fortunate to be able to pretty much choose my days and hours with minimal negotiation.  But I wasn’t silly. I gave a reasonable proposal, which obviously worked.

Ultimately, being a mum was one of the major reasons for me leaving my job that involved shifts.  I simply didn’t feel as passionate about my job since my life priorities changed AC.  Juggling childcare was also a major issues.  More importantly, I felt I was missing out on tea-times, bath times, bed times – bonding time.  You don’t get that back.

Where does this ruling stop though?

The article states that, “Women are more likely than men to be looking after children, so anything that disadvantages those with childcare responsibilities is discrimination against women.”

I might point out here that I worked full-time over an intensive 4 day week at first.  Now, I work part-time and I’m very glad that I do.  Part-time worker, still a full-time mummy as the label goes

I do fear that this ruling will cause bitterness, resentment and actually positively discriminate working mums…

What are your thoughts?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Read my indispensable guide to avoiding ‘Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Also available, my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

‘New’ ~ fresh eyes

Picture source: via Pinterest

So, I sat down to look for a photo on the computer to email to my friend.  It wasn’t going to take long… except I got totally, indulgently, lovingly distracted by pictures of our tiny, teeny, weeny little bear as a newborn.  All 6lb 2 oz of her at 37+1 weeks.

There she was.  Our beautiful, fragile, amazing little bear being weighted in her birthday suit seconds old.  More pictures at minutes old, hours old, days old, weeks old, months old… a few years old.  Most certainly not ‘newborn’ any more.

And so with the theme of ‘new’ running through this blog, I’m linking up with #TheThemeGame at The Reading Residence and Redpeffer.  Looking for something ‘new’ to do?  Join in!

On with my blog…

It’s incredible that theses amazing little balls of energy that we call our babies, our children, are always doing and learning something new.  All those milestones that you try to capture, that you try so hard not to forget or skim over at the time.  It never really stops though, does it?

Even as an adult, I often learn new things, be it knowledge or practical skills.  A lot of these things re actually learnt from spending quality time with our little bear, from watching her, from listening to her, from talking to her.

The questions she throws at me, in all their probing innocence really do make me thing.  A more recent one was, “Mummy, when I’m 5, will I still have hands?”  Instead of saying, “of course you will,” I simply said, “yes, you will.”  After all, it’s a perfectly reasonable thing for a small child to ask.

Being a parent means learning new things every day, whether it’s about yourself or your child, whether it’s learning to be flexible, budgeting, learning that each child is different and does things differently, or simply that every parent is different.

Children make you look at the world around you with a fresh pair of eyes.  There’s something new to be celebrated every day!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding ‘Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

“Little Miracle”

This week for my blog I was thinking ‘what to write?’

And then it came to me, I thought that I just might

Tell you all how to save a life, right here, right now,

You can ‘hellp’ you see; let me tell you how.

 

A group of ladies that I know had a ‘little miracle’ of a plan,

They compiled a book for charity, please give what you can.

It’s this ‘thing’ called HELLP syndrome which can affect anyone, it doesn’t care,

Whatever your pregnancy is like, it can strike any time, but we’re not trying to scare…

 

…Just trying to spread the word of this serious condition,

Because not everyone knows, so now “Little Miracle Book” is on a mission.

That pregnant lady is someone’s sister, daughter, mother, partner or maybe wife,

Please, just 5 minutes of your time, one click to ‘hellp’ save a life.

 

All profits from this book will go to charity.

 

Thank you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Also, just before you go… read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding ‘Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

 

Picture source: “Little Miracle Book”

Stargazing…

Picture source: via Google

I love #WordoftheWeek with The Reading Residence… because I love the personal  reflection involved with deciding which word sums up my week.  This week it’s ‘stargazing’.

Has anyone else been enjoying ‘Stargazing’ on CBeebies with their little ones?

We have!  It’s been fascinating learning about satellites, the moon, craters and why venus ‘glows’.

I was We were really excited to see the International Space Station featured.  We saw it with our own naked eyes over our house on Christmas Eve!  Truly incredible.

The presenters/writers on ‘Beebies’ (as we call it in our house!) did a great job breaking the information down into bitesize, easy to understand pieces.

It reminded me of when I was younger and my Dad sometimes watched ‘Newsround’ with John Craven with us – for the exact same reason – it was broken down into easy to understand bitesize pieces.

Thank you CBeebies for a great series…

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding ‘Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

Water ~ sink or swim

 

Picture source: via Pinterest

Fancy having some fun and discovering some new fab blogs? Then join in with #TheThemeGame over at The Reading Residence. This week’s theme is ‘water’…

 

Water ~ sink or swim

 

It’s that time of year again, it rolls around so soon.

It’s not Christmas or Easter or the cycle of the moon.

 

You see, the boiler needs a service to keep us safe and warm

or it will be condemned and be declared ‘boiler’ SORN.

 

So the plumber’s been, Billy boiler’s happy,

he strikes up into action, what a helpful chappy!

 

We leave the house, toys everywhere, quite simply, it’s a tip…

A few hours later we return to hear… drip, drip, drip…

 

Mouths open wide, we stand and stare, the kitchen floor’s a lake,

just what we didn’t need at tea time, for goodness’ sake.

 

Hubby grabs the phone, me the towels, how to amuse our little bear?

TV dinner of fish fingers and beans. Well, there’s water everywhere…

 

Long story short, hubby rings the so-called Mr Plumber,

you’ll find him on a google search under ‘dumb and dumber

 

…but there’s no reply, so a few phone calls later and he speaks to another guy,

and thanks to this man who has a plan, once again we’re warm and dry!

 

by Mummy Bear

 

Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-eclampsia… And visit my Facebook page or follow me @ComplicatedPreg.

 

Also available ~ my indispensable guide to avoiding Working MumGuilt. Whether you’re about to return to work or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the Guilt today!… And visit my Facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt.

 

 

Thank you.

 

 

 

Mums value your own opinions!

 

I would like to give a very warm welcome to Martina Pangrazzi (pictured above) as a guest blogger on MummyBear’sBlog.

Mums ~ value your own opinions!

I’m a mum of three – nine months old twins and a three year old and I am tired of hearing super cool sounding stories that give mothers the impression that they are the only ones that struggle to cope with having a child. We blame ourselves and we feel guilty when we’re not able to follow a picture of an amazing mother and we categorize our children as if there really was a manual for every child. We forget to value our own opinions and trust our own abilities and instincts.

Researchers, book writers and professionals are all trying to help; however, they can also confuse and mislead us. There is so much written about children and mothers, that it is hard for us to even imagine that we could think for ourselves, and follow our common sense.

Finding an attitude that maintains good health and well-being for both you and your children can sometimes be hard for even the strongest personalities.

As a mother, you are the most capable of finding out what makes your children happy, so believe in yourself as much as you believe in science and research or therapists and doctors!

Create your own rule book that will not only work for your children, but also for you.

Our children live in the present and whatever you’re giving them ‘NOW’ matters! Whatever you did wrong in the past, they do ‘NOT’ care about!

So you can have a fresh start every day!

 

By Martina Pangrazzi

Author of Learn from your Baby and Trust Yourself

www.martinapangrazzi.co.uk

Follow on twitter @MartinaContact and facebook

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Meanwhile, a little bit more from me…

Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding ‘Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

 

What’s to be gained from chucking out the chintz? #WotW

 Picture source: http://tinyurl.com/q4qblsw via Pinterest

This is not a ‘scheduled’ post for MummyBearsBlog but hey, I like the idea of The Reading Residence’s  ‘Word of the Week’ so much that you will often be seeing more ‘unscheduled’ posts in the future.   This post is, in fact, my ‘Literally Speaking’ post from my VirtuallyAllSorts blog from this week… you can blame my clear-out!  This week’s Word of the Week is ‘organised’.

“Enough’s enough,” I said out loud to myself.

Every time I tried to close a cupboard door, it sprang back open because of a rogue lead uncoiling into the door hinge…

There was only one thing for it – chuck out the chintz!

There was to be no reminiscing, I told myself.  There was to be no stalling.  There was to be no ‘stone’ left unturned.  There was to be nothing ‘useless’ left in the cupboard afterwards.

One hour later and the contents of said cupboard were on the floor instead.  Well, it was a start.

I had a ‘rubbish’ pile, a ‘keep in cupboard’ pile, a ‘file’ pile.

The reminiscing rule worked until I got to a box of ‘old’ photos and some old school work.  Wouldn’t you say that’s excusable though?

In that cupboard I found a ‘good luck’ card from my old sixth form tutor, too many years ago to be specific.  Her wording was very sincere and very accurate.  It read:

“Dear Carol.  Every good wish for the forthcoming examinations and your future happiness.  With your perception and insight you will achieve lofty heights.  With love, Elizabeth”

I will once again hold that card dear to my heart because she was a fantastic teacher and an inspiration.

A buoyant, sincere, very often no-holds-barred lady, she encouraged me, inspired me and believed in me.  She encouraged me to be me.

The picture is the very same one on the front of the postcard that she gave me.  An image from inside St. Paul’s Cathedral, London.

What useful, long-forgotten items have you found when clearing out?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding ‘Working Mum Guilt‘. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.