mummybearsblog

Blogging all things parenting… and sometimes a bit in between ;)

I’m tired of pre-eclampsia and HELLP syndrome ~ why I’m putting my anger to bed

The Prompt I'm tired of pre-eclampsia and HELLP syndrome

It’s fair to say that I’m generally a ‘live and let live’ happy-go-lucky person.  So when I saw that this week’s The Prompt was ‘anger’, I did wonder whether to do a blog post at all.  After all, with anger often comes resentment and that brings wasted energy and negativity…

 

However, over the past 5 years or so, I have harboured frustration, resentment, disappointment – ultimately ‘anger’ that I didn’t have the pregnancy or birth that so many other women are fortunate enough to have.

 

My pregnancy was complicated due to a low-lying placenta.  My birth experience was traumatic at best, due to pre-eclampsia and HELLP syndrome.  I had an emergency caesarean section.  Yes, I had been booked in for a planned section due to the complications, which medically I accepted but I hadn’t wanted an emergency section.

 

Deep down, I would love to have another child; a brother or sister for our little bear.  Deep down, I feel miffed, even robbed that the decision has been taken away from myself and hubby.  Deep down, those emotions ‘get me’.  Deep down.

 

I’ve never been able to push (no ironic pun intended) these emotions aside if I’m honest. Deep down, I’ve always hankered for answers to:

Why did it happen to me?

 

I’ll never get these answers unless I delve, deep down.  I don’t want to delve.  I’ve got a wonderful husband and an amazing, beautiful, healthy, happy little bear.  I’ve got a fantastic family.  I love them a million times over, deep down.

 

This love that I feel for them is more powerful than any of the emotions that have led to the ‘anger’.  And I thank ‘The Prompt’ for making me realise this.  The Prompt this week has made me ‘put it to bed’.

No more anger towards these pregnancy conditions.

More gratitude towards my family (not that I wasn’t beyond grateful already).

More love.

I’ll still raise awareness of pre-eclampsia and HELLP syndrome.  I’ll still be a part of the facebook, twitter and blogging communities that support fellow survivors.

No more anger.

Just acceptance, love and gratitude from hereon in 🙂

 

mumturnedmom
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Post Comment Love

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Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding ‘Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

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Rules are meant to be broken ~ let’s can the “can’t”

the prompt rules

You can’t do this.

You can’t do that.

You can’t wear this.

You can’t wear that.

You can’t say this.

You can’t say that.

“Can’t” is a word which I don’t like to hear.  I don’t like to hear it as a person and I certainly don’t like to hear it as a mum.

We want our children to achieve their full potential, right?  Well then, let’s stop telling them “can’t”.

Let’s start telling them “can”.

Our little ones’ brains soak up affirmation, praise and love like a sponge.  It’s a cliche but it’s true.

Our little ones’ brains also soak up negativity as I’ve highlighted in post on my Virtually All Sorts blog and they will usually believe us if we tell them they can’t do something.

Let’s believe in our children and believe that they “can”.  Let’s throw the “can’t” into the proverbial can that is the bin.  The ‘has been’.

What do you think?

Thanks to Sara at MumTurnedMom for giving us this week’s prompt: “Rules are meant to be broken”

mumturnedmom
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Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

6 Comments »

Guilty pleasures…

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You know that feeling when the little one has gone to bed?  You know that feeling when you just want to flop, have a nice hot cuppa… and a little something nice to go with it?

Well, my ‘something nice’ had become a habit!  It was usually the slice of cake that was still in my work bag that I hadn’t got round toe eating.  Maybe I know deep down that I won’t get a chance to eat it and actually I’m saving it for my ‘something nice’ moment…

My something nice was invariably something that gave me a ‘hit’, something that I gobbled down far too quickly.  Something that in actual fact made me sluggish…

I knew it was time to change my habits.  My friend took up the Couch to 5k challenge and also Sara (the very same MumTurnedMom whose linky this is!) inspired me to get off that couch 🙂

There was just one obstacle.  Little bear was in bed and hubby wasn’t due home from work for another hour.  My enthusiasm would be gone by then.  So I grabbed my earphones and took to the garden instead!  I wouldn’t be beaten.  I’m now working my way through the weeks and you know what?  I’m absolutely loving it AND look forward to my runs.  That’s coming from someone who hated cross country at school.  I love swimming but actually it’s quite pricey.  But running – well it’s free!

So my ‘something nice’ changed from the sluggish cake to the reviving, satisfying run.

That, dear readers, is my something nice, my guilty pleasure, my little bit of me-time and I’m also planning  to run the Race for Life in July!

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I’ve linked up with MumturnedMom #ThePrompt for this post

 

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Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

12 Comments »

That was unexpected…

mummy bears blog

It was such a beautiful day that we had a short walk to one of the local recs.  There was only 1 other child (and adult) there at first, so our little bear had the run of the play area.  Then a few more turned up so the roundabout/slide/fireman’s pole had to be shared.  This wasn’t a problem as our little bear is actually very good at sharing now (generally…!)

One little girl in particular took a shine to our little bear.  They went on the roundabout together, then ran to the swings together, then the fireman’s pole.  You get the idea!

You know as a parent at the park when your little one’s ‘click’ with another child?  That moment when they happily play together and you’re standing there (or sitting) like a lemon with their parent?  Well it’s moments like this when I resist the temptation to use my phone (twitter/facebook) as a safety net.

This was one of those occasions.  We made small talk – I asked how old their little girl was and vice versa.  We both commented that it was nice to get some fresh air.  Somewhere in there ‘she’ mentioned that her little one goes to the childminder and I said our little bear did too.

Our 2 little ones had a ball playing with each other.  When we both took short phone calls, we each helped the others child down the fireman’s pole.  Then they had to leave and ‘she’ asked me if our little bear was called ‘her name’ because their child had wanted to say goodbye to our little bear.  It was then that it dawned on us…  Both our little ones go to the same childminder!  We hear so much about their little girl and she is so sweet in ‘real life’!  5 minutes later, we learnt that we live close to each other and exchanged phone numbers for holiday/weekend play dates.

Our little bear had met her little friend and I had made a new one.  That was unexpected…

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I’ve linked up with Let’s Talk Mommy #Share With Me and MumturnedMom #ThePrompt for this post

ShareWithMePicM

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Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

14 Comments »

3 wishes

3 wishes the prompt share with me

Picture source: Brens Cakes via Pinterest

Three wishes in three words…

Aside from the words any loving, nurturing parent would choose for their child to be (happy, confident, heathy…), here are three wishes that I would choose for our little bear:

  1. Have good, solid friends who will understand you through the good and bad times.  And vice versa.
  2. Be sensitive to others, yet be assertive when needed.
  3. Be free-spirited – if you believe in something enough, grab it and go for it.  Shun negativity.

Three simple wishes to share with you and with our little bear.

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I’ve linked up with Let’s Talk Mommy #Share With Me and MumturnedMom #ThePrompt for this post

ShareWithMePicM

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Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

6 Comments »

‘My’ spring project…

spring

For me, spring conjures up lovely days of being outside, as I’m sure it may do for you too.  With that in mind, I was quite chuffed to acquire a nice wine rack.  Seeing as how I don’t drink any more, I suggested to hubby that we might turn the rack on its side and put plants in the holes.  Perfect and creative.

That was until our little bear got hold of it and turned it into her ‘princess castle’ to, “go with my pony castle mummy!”

She’s had hours of fun with ‘my’ spring project…!

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I’ve linked up with Let’s Talk Mommy #Share With Me and MumturnedMom #ThePrompt for this post

ShareWithMePicM

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Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

20 Comments »

Prompted to be in reflective mood…

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Picture source: mumturnedmom.com

There is so much to reflect on when our little ones grow up so fast, in front of our very own eyes.

 

As they become more and more articulate, as they hold their own full-flung conversations, as they continue to push those boundaries and learn to stand their ground!

 

It could be a sad time, seeing your little one grow up, but I prefer to reflect on those times with pure happiness.  With gratitude.  With the sincere feeling of being blessed with the feeling of having created another human being, another life who is part of you, part of their daddy and, perhaps more importantly, part of themselves.

 

A time of reflection should be an opportunity to celebrate what someone or something has become, and therefore also a time to look forward with anticipation at what lays ahead.

 

Positively exciting!

 

I’ve linked up with mumturnedmom.com #ThePrompt for this post.

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Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

2 Comments »

Be wise. Be prepared…

Baden-Powell_ggbain-39190_(cropped) the prompt

Picture source: via wikidpedia

“Seek the wisdom of the ages but look at the world through the eyes of a child.”  Ron Wild

I have very happy memories of being a brownie when I was a little girl.  The pride I felt when I was ‘sworn in’.  The pride I felt when I earnt a new badge (thanks to my Mum for sewing them all on… not sure I ever got the ‘sewing’ badge!).  The pride I felt when I became sixer, top dog, of The Pixies.

As a ‘branch’ of brownies, we were headed up by ‘Brown Owl’ and ‘Tawny Owl’.  No coincidence perhaps that both were owls and both were ‘wise’, seeking ‘the wisdom of the ages’.  What a fantastic concept… one that helped me to learn a little more about the world around me in a slightly different way.   Lord Baden-Powell could have written this week’s prompt but he didn’t… surprisingly.

For this post I’ve linked up with mumturnedmom.com

#ThePrompt

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Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

9 Comments »

Pink is for girls… And why we stayed neutral

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Picture source: Silver Cross via Pinterest

So it seems that pink really is for girls and blue is indeed for boys.  When we went shopping for ur travel system back in the day, we didn’t know the sex of our baby.  We looked a the price tag for the pink and blue ones (travel systems, not babies!) and we’re gob smacked when we realised that the neutral coloured one was far more expensive than the gender-specific ones.  (Disclaimer – the pictured pram was not  the brand I’m referring to here…)

 

Needless to say, we opted for the the blue one, thinking we could put a girl in blue but not vice versa! There is irony in that in itself…

 

Did you have a similar experience?

I’ve linked up with mumturnedmom.com for this post.

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Read my emotional and inspiring true story ‘Diary of a Complicated Pregnancy’. Available now through my website at Virtually All Sorts. 50% of sales to the charity Action on Pre-Eclampsia. …and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @ComplicatedPreg

Also available – my indispensable guide to avoiding Working Mum Guilt’. Whether you are about to return or have already started back, this book offers practical solutions and feedback from real Mums with real families in real situations. Covering topics such as Post Natal Depression, childcare options, yours and your child’s development and time management – Ditch the guilt today! … and visit my facebook page or follow me on twitter @WorkingMumGuilt

Thank you.

11 Comments »

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